Just a break

I wish I could tell you...
Tell you to stop texting me back...
I wish I could tell you to move the fuck on. It was just a one night stand that's it.
tell you to stop asking me if I wanna watch movies...
because I know where those movies gonna end and the next morning I know I'll be hustling around and won't even have time to think and if you ask me again I'll say I m busy again and I am tired and I just wanna go to sleep.
I wish I could tell you I am just too scared to get rejected again.
I don't wanna be caught up on those feelings again
and I don't wanna be miserable again who cries on every little thing.

Last time I remember it took me 2 years to move on because I gave all of me and expected too much and trust me if I fall I know I am gonna fall way more harder than last time but before that, I am gonna do my best to close all the doors, shut everything down and let people know i was just a mean bitch who had high standard and high attitude.

Just give me a break I am not ready to see you again.
I just wanna think through it.
I have mixed feelings and I don't wanna be in the middle of gray when I am supposed to be choosing white or black.

Just give me a long break.
A really long break and a long time so that i can forget about you
I can forget how cuddling in your arms felt like
I can forget how your little tiny getures made me feel
How your tiny little questions asking if I am okay, made me feel about you
or the next awkward but not so awkward morning where you massaged my back and asked if I want coffee
and the next thing i did was run away
Just give me some break to blur all those memories and then might think about taking another step

Just a break
and when we meet each other like the last time, I might think again if I wanna open the door and choose white or just shut the windows and blinds and choose black.

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