So pardon if I

The air got me feeling like a tiny leaf,
making me move here and there,
making me shiver from its each blow.
So pardon if I just lose myself.
Because I can't take it anymore,
because I can't bear it anymore
others are hanging still and straight
but I am no others.

This water got me feeling pretty,
washing away my dust.
This drizzling was never better.
But now,
it starts to storm.
It hits me from its sharp drop,
which was once a soft bulge.
So pardon if I am breaking,
shattering and tearing as if 
someone has just 
ripped out my heart.

Unable to handle the excruciating pain
now I am falling
listening to my last beat
savoring my last sight
slowly falling.
Falling so calmly that
I can hear no more whips, 
no more blows,
no more thunders, 
no more storms.
I am falling calmly on the muddy soil
back to where I started.

The soil is now like my guardian
holding me like a feather
carrying me with no pressure.
It was neither harsh like air
which seemed so transparent
painful like a water,
which seemed so condensed.
It was soft and calm
though it seemed hard and tough in its ugly color.
So, pardon if I have judged you
because now I feel the pain
of betrayal from the loved one.

My body now lays down on the ground
brown and gray
which was once
yellow and green.
Someone picked me up
thrashed me with many other fellows
throwing us in a pit
lighting us with a match stick.

The red flame starts
 to ignite higher and higher.
This fire got my body
burning every scratch,
every hole,
every torn up parts.
It wasn't a cold like air
or icy as water.
So pardon if I thought you wrong.

Slowly and silently
some part just vanished in air forming smoke
while some part formed ashes
here came a drop of rain
a hint of air
and with another drop
and another hint again
I sniffed.

Once again

maybe that's what life is.

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