I was 9. I am 20 now and I still carry those scars
I was 17 he was 24
I shouted, yelled, dug my nails deep into his skin and begged to stop
but he didn't
he kept going,
he kept going
until he ripping my soul, tattoed scars and marks all over my body.
He was my brother's friend.
he was 56 and I was 17
I don't know if it means anything coming out from a transgender but it happened.
at the metro station, concerts, work and at home by my own family member.
As a 6th grader
group of boys marched towards me like a murder of crows and magpies
like a cackle of hyenas
held me against the wall
pulled my shirt up high
just to see if I stuffed my bra with Charmin or bounty
survivor of kidnap
survivor of harassment, rape, physical abuse by my husband
and every trail
each and every trail were like being raped all over again
#not only girls but men too
oh come on men don't get assaulted
men are gorillas
men are meant to be brawny
men are meant to be tough
men are meant to be rough
men are meant to be strong
men are meant to be tough, rough and strong.
but dear world know that deep down this gorillas are humans
who have their own insecurities
I am a man and I was assaulted by my own mother.
I have been sexually assaulted by a woman.
People still tell me I should have liked it and been happy.
And, I am tried of howling screaming and roaring that I didn't like it.
I am a man
I didn't find it good in any way.
I am shouting infront of you
reciting different stories and incidents
But at the same time I am tired
tired of hiding my secret
I was assaulted too
I was assaulted by a stranger in the public
who didn't hesitate to dug his nails deep down on my breast
And I am not sorry
I am not sorry to drag him in the main street
I am not sorry that I kicked his balls
I am not sorry that I shouted in the public
I am not sorry protecting myself against his greedy hands
I am not sorry for grabbing his collar
and looking at those filthy eyes with fury of anger
BEFORE YOU FUCK THE EAGLE
LEARN HOW TO FLY.